They say that what doesn't kill us makes us who we are.

Here's the thing: I have a zillion things I really want to do right now. Like, literally, my head is just about spinning with it all. Here's a short list of things I would like to do right now, simultaneously, but can't because I'm at work/it would be physically impossible:

1. write this blog
2. write a blog re: my trip to VA, part II of my chicago trip, a year in review, little updates from this week...
3. start maybe ten screenplays
4. play the guitar.
5. fiddle on a keyboard (hello Her Space Holiday/Motion City Sountrack!)
6. play the drums
7. rearrange my apt.
8. get my hair cut
9. drink hot chocolate
10. go to the bathroom

Ridiculous, I know. About the bathroom situation...I'm supposed to be glued to the phone/emails coming through at work right now. For instance, if I have to go to the bathroom, I usually leave the door open and don't turn on the light/fan, so I can hear if the phone rings. Yes, I pee in the dark at work. Holla!

But there are still two attorneys here in the office right now. Thus, preventing me from going to the bathroom with the door open/going to the bathroom at all, because I can't let them hear the phone ring while I'm all "tra-la-la...peeing with the light on/loud ass fan. phone? what phone? job? what job? hello. goodbye. thank you."

In short (too late, obvs), I have to pee like whoa right now. For anyone who doesn't know (approaching TMI territory, JP...), when I have to pee I get "the shivers". My friend Keighty gave a name to my strange condition when I was in high school (in Novi. Holla!). Basically, when I have to pee for more than maybe two minutes, I get the chills about every minute or so. But if i hold it for too long, they come in great waves every few seconds. My finger tips go numb and purple from being so effing cold and i start to, you guessed it: shiver. I have a mean case of the shivers right now. Like, whoa.

I should be able to take care of that one soon, I hope.

And actually, regarding #'s 8 & 9. I will take care of those in an hour or so when I meet Natalie at my mom's. She will cut my hair (finally) and we will both drink hot chocolate.

Still shivering... Like the Coldplay song "Shiver", only terrible.

Since I cannot even begin to approach any part of this list in the near future (i.e. tonight), I am going to pick an entirely new thing to want to do and do that instead, mainly because it is the only thing I am capable of doing right now, because I am still stuck at work (shivering).



This Time Last Year

December 2006: Casa de Homo




Last year during the month of December, I lived with Eric. It was fabulous. We got along really well as roommates. In fact, one of the first nights we were there together (after the honeymoon, obvs), he came hopping into my room in a pillow case and asked, "wanna race?"

Obvs, I fell madly in love with Eric, and that love only grows stronger every day.

We had a great time because Eric is silly and I have the potential, but will never do it on my own, unless provoked. So, kind of, it was a little bit like still living with Val, whenever she would get giggly and fart on me. (ps: love you, miss you again already!)




See what I mean about Eric being silly? This photograph dates back to early dec. of last year when I bought a baking station from Target (amazing, this baking station) and had to assemble it by myself. Eric refuses to assemble things. I don't even wanna get into that right now. Anyway, I am relatively handy, so it was more fun than anything else.

Eric sat in his room the whole time writing and when I was done, the first thing he did was put on the box like it was outfit. No mention of "wow, that looks great. nice job. you are the best lesbian wife a gay man could ever ask for." None of that. It was more like, "Rar! I'm a box monster!" He put some of the packaging in his eyes and called them "monster contacts" and then spent half an hour chasing the cat around.

See why I love Eric?




This is Eric's cat/my cat for a hot second. Her name is Squeakers and it is only by the grace of, god knows what, that Squeakers is still breathing/rubbing her vag on things. Gross. She only does it when she's in heat. But she's nearly perpetually in heat, so it feels like all the time if you live with it. We almost punched her in the vag maybe ten times. I know I thought about it all day long when she would wander around hovering close to everything, rubbing her vag scent on every. single. thing.

I still cannot believe I ever lived with that cat/kept her for a while when Eric was away living on a shelf for a gagillion dollars a month. I called him Nick Nack for a while.

Anyway, living with Eric was fantastic and I was all kinds of sad when he said he was leaving. But for now, without jumping into the next month, I would like to recall the short, but glorious time we spent together and savor it.

I'm remembering now, how he taught me how to play the styrofoam violin.




And then another time, he helped me cover Mandy in yamakas.




Good times. I'm gonna go pee now.